Have You Eaten Yet?

Creating Your Own Happiness Is Life-Changing: Chef Tarell Mcintosh

August 11, 2022 Kassata Bollman / Chef Tarell Mcintosh Episode 29
Have You Eaten Yet?
Creating Your Own Happiness Is Life-Changing: Chef Tarell Mcintosh
Show Notes Transcript Chapter Markers

My Guest Is Chef Tarell Mcintosh A.K.A “Chef Tee”.

 This Marks The First Update Episode We’ve Ever Had On Have You Eaten Yet.

 Chef Tee Joins Us From London

Where Currently He’s The Chef & Owner Of Caribbean Restaurant Sugarcane.

They Recently Celebrated Their One Year Anniversary.

 Reaching That Milestone Was Not Easy.

Chef Tee Experienced Many Highs And Lows On His Path To Get There.

We’ll Talk About All Of That Plus…

 We Discuss:

✅  The Three Pillars Of Happiness According To Arthur C. Brooks For His 100th Column For The Atlantic.  He Explains His Biggest Happiness Lessons Which Transcend Circumstance And Time.


https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCsxzx6an6DeVHLcIfN05MUg


https://www.tiktok.com/@haveyoueatenyetpodcast


https://www.instagram.com/haveyoueatenyetpodcast/?hl=en

[[MUSIC]]

 

I’M KASSATA BOLLMAN. 

TODAY MY GUEST IS CHEF TARELL MCINTOSH... A.K.A…. “CHEF TEE.”

 

AND MANY OF YOU ALREADY KNOW HIM…..THIS IS A REUNION OF SORTS….

 

THIS MARKS THE FIRST UPDATE EPISODE…. WE’VE EVER HAD…ON HAVE YOU EATEN YET….

 

SO THAT BEING SAID….IF YOU HAVE NOT LISTENED TO CHEF TEE’S ORIGINAL EPISODE….YOU MIGHT WANT TO GO DO THAT…..

IT WAS RAW…INSPIRING….AND EXTREMELY OPEN AND HONEST….IT AIRED BACK IN NOVEMBER 20-21….. 

 

ALRIGHT….SO BACK TO THE PRESENT……CHEF TEE JOINS US FROM LONDON….

 

WHERE...CURRENTLY….. HE’S THE CHEF & OWNER OF CARIBBEAN RESTAURANT SUGARCANE……THEY RECENTLY CELEBRATED THEIR ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY….

 

REACHING THAT MILESTONE WAS NOT EASY….CHEF TEE EXPERIENCED MANY HIGHS AND LOWS…..ON HIS PATH…TO GET THERE……

 

WE’LL TALK ABOUT ALL OF THAT……PLUS….

 

WE’LL BE DISCUSSING…. 


THE THREE PILLARS OF HAPPINESS…ACCORDING TO ARTHUR C. BROOKS….FOR HIS 100TH COLUMN FOR THE ATLANTIC…..HE EXPLAINS HIS BIGGEST HAPPINESS LESSONS….WHICH TRANSCEND CIRCUMSTANCE ….AND TIME….



SO I’LL START BY ASKING…..AS WE ALWAYS DO….CHEF TEE…..

 “HAVE YOU EATEN YET?”......


SPECIFICALLY ….SO FAR….. IN 20-22…..WHAT MEAL DO YOU HAVE A REALLY GREAT MEMORY ABOUT   ?  …..


 

[[CHEF TEE DISCUSSES]]

 

 

 

 

BREAK IN

 

LAST WINTER……AFTER OUR INTERVIEW…. SOMEONE BROKE INTO YOUR RESTAURANT ….AND THE DAMAGE FROM THAT BREAK-IN WAS EXPENSIVE….

 

IN THAT MOMENT…..YOU WEREN’T SURE HOW TO MOVE FORWARD….

 

BUT…… THE COMMUNITY AROUND YOU STEPPED UP….

 

THEY CREATED AN ONLINE FUNDRAISING CAMPAIGN…..

 

AND SUPPORTED YOU IN A BIG WAY…..

 

THIS….. ALLOWED YOU TO RE-OPEN….

 

DURING THAT TIME YOU ALSO RECEIVED A TON OF PRESS IN MAJOR PUBLICATIONS IN LONDON….. AND YOU WERE ON BBC RADIO….

 

FOR ME…..KNOWING YOU…..AND YOUR STORY…….I FELT TERRIBLE FOR WHAT YOU WERE GOING THROUGH…..BUT……. SEEING THE COMMUNITY POURING THEIR HEARTS AND MONEY….. INTO REPAIRING YOUR RESTAURANT DID NOT SURPRISE ME……AND SEEING ALL THE PRESS YOU RECEIVED DID NOT SURPRISE ME…..HERE’S WHY:

 

I BELIEVE THAT THE UNIVERSE BALANCES US WHENEVER IT POSSIBLY CAN….DURING TOUGH TIMES……MAYBE YOU EXPERIENCE LOSS…..BUT GROWTH HAPPENS IN ANOTHER PART OF YOUR LIFE….AND IT COULD BE SMALL GROWTH….THAT IF YOU’RE NOT TAPPED IN SPIRITUALLY….YOU MIGHT EVEN MISS THAT GROWTH…… OR BALANCE…..

 

YOU…AND I SAY THIS AS SOMEONE WHO HAS ONLY MET YOU VIRTUALLY….NEVER IN PERSON….BUT TO ME…IT APPEARS THAT YOU ARE CONNECTED….YOU HAVE A STRONG PRESENCE…. AND SO FAR…… YOUR JOURNEY …..AT LEAST FROM THE OUTSIDE…..LOOKS PRETTY BALANCED….

 

I’D LOVE FOR YOU TO GO BACK TO THE DAYS & WEEKS FOLLOWING THE BREAK-IN…..WHAT WAS LIFE LIKE?

 

AND…. DID YOU FEEL THE BALANCE….. OF TRAGEDY AND FORTUNE? 

 

 

[[CHEF TEE DISCUSSES]]

 

THERE’S A QUOTE I WAS READING THE OTHER DAY….

 

“YOU CAN CHOOSE TO BE A VICTIM TO YOUR CIRCUMSTANCES….OR….. TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR HOW YOU CHOOSE…… TO PERCEIVE THEM…..”

 

NOW….MONTHS LATER….LOOKING BACK…..HOW DO YOU PERCEIVE THE 

BREAK-IN  ?…..

 

[[CHEF TEE DISCUSSES]]

 

LIFE

 

RECENTLY ON INSTAGRAM…..YOU WERE OPEN AND HONEST ABOUT BEING CLOSE TO GIVING UP ON LIFE….

 

THOUGHTS OF SUICIDE AFFECTED YOU BACK IN MAY…YOU ENDED UP CLOSING YOUR RESTAURANT FOR 3 WEEKS….TO DEAL WITH THAT…..

 

FIRST I WANT TO THANK YOU FOR OPENLY TALKING ABOUT THIS….YOU ARE NOT THE FIRST PERSON TO TALK ABOUT THIS…HERE ON THIS PODCAST….

 

AND I SAY THAT…BECAUSE THESE ARE THOUGHTS….THAT ARE REAL….AND ARE COMMON….AND I BELIEVE THAT THE MORE WE OPENLY TALK ABOUT THIS ISSUE…THE MORE WE CAN END THE STIGMA THAT STILL SURROUNDS IT…….

 

IT MAY BE HARD TO PUT INTO WORDS….BUT IF YOU COULD TRY….I THINK IT WOULD BE HELPFUL FOR OTHER PEOPLE LISTENING NOW…..TO BETTER UNDERSTAND THESE THOUGHTS….

 

IN THE DAYS AND WEEKS LEADING UP TO THE MOMENT THAT YOU WERE CONSIDERING GIVING UP…..WHAT WERE YOU GOING THROUGH? …….WHAT THOUGHTS WERE GOING THROUGH YOUR MIND?

 

 

[[CHEF TEE DISCUSSES]]

 

 

DURING THAT TIME….WAS THERE ANYTHING THAT COULD HAVE POSSIBLY MADE A POSITIVE DIFFERENCE….. IN CHANGING YOUR THOUGHTS ? 

 

IS THERE ANYTHING A PERSON COULD HAVE SAID…… OR DONE TO MAKE ANY DIFFERENCE TO YOU……. AND YOUR HEADSPACE? 

 

[[CHEF TEE DISCUSSES]]

SELF RELIANCE

 

ALSO ON INSTAGRAM….. YOU SHARED A LESSON THAT YOU RECENTLY LEARNED…..

 

YOU SAID QUOTE: 

 

“SINCE HAVING A MENTAL BREAKDOWN THIS YEAR….. AND ENDING IN HOSPITAL FROM IT…….A FEW GAVE UP ON ME….. AND LEFT ME BE…”

 

FROM THAT…..SELF RELIANCE AND CREATING YOUR OWN HAPPINESS….. WAS ONE OF THE LESSONS THAT YOU MENTIONED….. 

 

SOMETHING THAT I TRY TO KEEP IN MIND…….IS TO HAVE FAITH…… THAT YOU AND THE UNIVERSE…… HAVE CREATED EVERYTHING FOR YOUR GROWTH…. AND TO BE GRATEFUL FOR IT …..NO MATTER WHAT…….

 

I DON’T ALWAYS HAVE THAT FAITH……BUT READING YOUR WORDS REMINDED ME OF THIS THOUGHT…..THINGS HAPPENED…..PEOPLE LEFT…..YOU LEARNED A LESSON….IN THE MOMENT IT FEELS TERRIBLE….YOU FEEL ALONE…..BUT IT’S HAPPENING FOR YOUR GROWTH….

 

DO YOU FEEL GRATEFUL FOR BEING REMINDED OF SELF RELIANCE…… AND THE IMPORTANCE OF CREATING YOUR OWN HAPPINESS?

 

[[CHEF TEE DISCUSSES]]

 

 

 

I THINK THIS IS A GREAT PLACE FOR ALL OF US TO REMEMBER……THAT THERE’S NO LACK OF THINGS TO BE GRATEFUL FOR…… IF YOU REMEMBER TO PAY ATTENTION…..

 

WE ALL FORGET TO DO THAT AT POINTS IN OUR LIVES….BUT GRATITUDE IS KEY…..

 

 

HAPPINESS LESSONS

SO IS HAPPINESS…..AND NOW WE’RE GOING TO DISSECT THE THREE PILLARS OF HAPPINESS…WITH CHEF TEE……


THESE PILLARS ARE EXPLAINED BY ARTHUR C. BROOKS….IN HIS 100TH COLUMN FOR THE ATLANTIC…..WHERE HE EXPLAINS HIS BIGGEST HAPPINESS LESSONS…..

 

 

 

HERE’S THE FIRST ONE:

 

MOTHER NATURE DOESN'T CARE IF YOU ARE HAPPY…….

 

MONEY, POWER, PLEASURE, AND HONOR …..WON’T BRING YOU HAPPINESS.

 

HAPPINESS IS YOUR RESPONSIBILITY.

 

TO BE HAPPY, YOU NEED TO CURTAIL YOUR WORDLY APPETITES….. AND INSTEAD PURSUE WHAT TRULY BRINGS ENDURING HAPPINESS: 

 

A FAITH OR LIFE PHILOSOPHY, FAMILY RELATIONSHIPS, REAL FRIENDSHIP, AND MEANINGFUL WORK.

 

CHEF TEE….DO YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE?

 

 

[[CHEF TEE DISCUSSES]]

 

 

OK, HERE’S THE SECOND ONE:

 

LASTING HAPPINESS COMES FROM HABITS, NOT HACKS….

 

MINDFUL, DAILY PRACTICES STRENGTHEN YOUR RELATIONSHIPS, DEEPEN YOUR WISDOM, AND UNCOVER MEANING IN YOUR LIFE. 

 

HAPPY FEELINGS ARE EVIDENCE OF HAPPINESS…….WHICH IS A COMBINATION OF ENJOYMENT, SATISFACTION, AND PURPOSE.

 

IMPROVEMENT IN THESE AREAS REQUIRES COMMITMENT AND EFFORT, LIKE ANYTHING ELSE THAT IS WORTHWHILE.

 

CHEF TEE…WHAT SAY YOU….. ABOUT MINDFUL DAILY PRACTICES  ?….DO THEY HELP WITH HAPPINESS?

 

 

[[CHEF TEE DISCUSSES]]

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

HERE’S THE LAST ONE:

 

HAPPINESS IS LOVE

 

…..YOU CAN’T CHOOSE HOW MUCH LOVE YOU WILL GET…..BUT HAPPINESS DEPENDS MORE ON HOW MUCH YOU GIVE. 

 

AND WHAT YOU GIVE YOUR LOVE TO MATTERS JUST AS MUCH. 

 

HERE’S A HANDY FORMULA TO GO BY: 

 

HAPPY PEOPLE LOVE PEOPLE AND USE THINGS; UNHAPPY PEOPLE USE PEOPLE AND LOVE THINGS.

 

CHEF TEE….THAT FORMULA HIT ME…..WHAT DO YOU THINK?

 

 

 

[[CHEF TEE DISCUSSES]]

 

FINDING INSPIRATION

IN THE LAST MONTH…..WHAT’S GIVING YOU LIFE AND INSPIRATION ? ......

 

[[CHEF TEE DISCUSSES]]




FUTURE

WHAT DOES YOUR IDEAL NEAR FUTURE LOOK LIKE…..WE’RE TALKING THE REST OF 20-22 ?......

 

[[CHEF TEE DISCUSSES]]

 

 

 

 

 

SYNCHRONICITIES



SO FAR, THIS YEAR…..HAVE THERE BEEN ANY SIGNS OR SYNCHRONICITIES IN YOUR LIFE…. THAT STOOD OUT TO YOU……. 


IF SO, PLEASE DESCRIBE THE MOMENT….


 

 

[[CHEF TEE DISCUSSES]]




FLOW STATE:



FLOW STATE….I KNOW YOU’VE BEEN IN THAT ZONE BEFORE….WE’VE TALKED ABOUT IT……

BUT SO FAR THIS YEAR….TELL US ABOUT YOUR FAVORITE MOMENT ….WHERE THAT EUPHORIC FEELING… THAT SENSE OF HAPPINESS…WAS FLOWING THROUGH YOUR BODY…….



 

[[CHEF TEE DISCUSSES]]

 









TAKEAWAY:


CHEF TEE, THANK YOU FOR UPDATING US WITH YOUR STORY …

 

YOU KNOW HOW WE END THE PODCAST…. BY ASKING…. IF THERE’S ANY TAKEAWAY THAT YOU’D LIKE TO LEAVE WITH LISTENERS…... THAT CAN POSITIVELY INFLUENCE THEIR LIVES.

 

IT COULD BE SOMETHING THAT WE JUST DISCUSSED…. A LESSON YOU’VE LEARNED ON YOUR JOURNEY…. OR GENERAL LIFE ADVICE THAT YOU LIVE BY ….…


 

[[CHEF TEE DISCUSSES]]



AND REMIND PEOPLE WHERE THEY CAN FOLLOW YOU  ?



 

[[CHEF TEE DISCUSSES]]



OUTRO:


THANKS FOR LISTENING….AND IF YOU HAVEN’T ALREADY….... FOLLOW  “HAVE YOU EATEN YET?” ….WHEREVER YOU GET YOUR PODCASTS….




[[MUSIC]]



BREAK IN
LIFE
SELF RELIANCE
HAPPINESS LESSONS
FINDING INSPIRATION
FUTURE
SYNCHRONICITIES
FLOW STATE
TAKEAWAY